New Year’s Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. Mark Twain
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. Benjamin Franklin
Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. Oprah Winfrey
New Year’s Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive. Jay Leno
May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions. Joey Adams
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to. P.J. O’Rourke